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Feels
Backed Up
2003-07-07
Sometimes even the most antisocial person needs some kind of an interaction with humans. For me when this time comes I prefer males and to be more specific on the interaction, I�d like a good game of tonsil hockey. Yet you don�t always get what you want and when this occurs you become �backed up� as Natalie says it, fr the lack of a better wording. Well I am very backed up to put it mildly.Everything got worse when my cousin took me along with him to hang out with his friends. Their idea of fun turned out to be going to the gym and doing exercises. I refused to participate. Me straining to lift a weight is not a picture I want to be remembered by. Instead I took a seat on the window and watched. Let�s just that being in a room full of half naked men, huffing and puffing, did not ease my �problem�. I tried averting my eyes to the Cindy Crawford poster that hung on the wall, fearing that if I stared longer my tongue might roll out, steam could come out of my head and my eyes would pop out like in those silly cartoons. But the boys kept making conversation and I was inclined to glance their way. After a bit of muscle expanding, they wanted to go to the pool. To this I had to put my foot down. Seeing those boys in Speedos would only lead to bad things. Instead I asked them to take me home.
All these needs lead to desperation. And my act of desperation was calling Peter. If you would read the entry about him, you would see few minor details that would make this shocking. Yes, I haven�t seen him for 3 years, and sure we barely had a relationship. Oh and I do believe I dumped him. I hoped he would omit these details from his memory of me. But when you are in need of male affection you tend to put your pride aside and gravel. Well I didn�t gravel and my pride is still intact. And maybe one day I�ll tell you what happened.